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avatar southcentralLAguy 1 mon.ago

Guy at the pet store told me I could get a parakeet for $20.

But I didn’t need 2 so I asked him if I could get one for $10.

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. When two people have sex, it's a twosome. When three people have sex, it's threesome

Now I know why people call you handsome

2. The 1910s-1930s can be described as "war, pandemic, party, depression, war."

The 2010s-2030s will be described the same way, except we skipped the party.

3. Honey, how long until you're done with the dishes?

- Half an hour, but if you help me, it'll be faster. - No, half an hour is fine!

4. A married couple has two stunningly beautiful daughters

A couple has two stunningly beautiful daughters, but their third child is a very ugly son. Man to his wife: "You cheated on me!" "No, not this time"

5. The lead singer of U2 is a paradox

Obviously, he started out as an amateur playing music for free, but as soon as he starts charging money, he's Pro Bono.

6. Centipede

Imagine how noisy centipedes would be if they wore tiny flip flops.

7. I visited the monk living in a remote and secluded monastery to ask him how he fills his days. "With rosary and coffee," he said

"Rosario can you bring us more coffee?""

8. A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night.

Oof !

9. Testing the water

Two aquatic creatures find themselves inside an unexpected piece of military equipment. One of them, clearly unprepared for the situation, turns to the other and asks if they have the necessary skills to operate it.

10. Dad I have a Question

Son: How do stars die? Dad: An overdose, usually.

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